d20 Modern: Heavens and Earths
Ian “Patches” O’Houlihan
“If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball. If you can dodge traffic, you can dodge a ball. Dodgeball is a sport of violence, exclusion, and degradation.”
“Necessary? Is it necessary for me to drink my own urine? Probably not. No, but I do it anyway because it’s sterile and I like the taste.”
O’Houlihan is a dodgeball legend of the 1950s-era. Now an aging, wheelchair-bound Patches volunteers to coach at St. Andrews Sports Center’s team. Patches’ training regimen includes throwing wrenches at the team, forcing them to dodge oncoming cars, and constantly berating them with insults.